934. Is the loss of those who are dear to us a legitimate source of sorrow, as this loss is both irreparable and independent of our will?
“This cause of sorrow, from which neither the rich nor the poor are safe, is either a trial or atonement. However, you have the consolation of communicating with them through the means you already possess, while awaiting other means that will be more direct, and more open to your senses.”
935. What should we think of the opinion that communication with those beyond the grave is sacrilegious?
“There can be no desecration where there is respectful thought and sympathy, and when the communication is made with due respect. The proof of this is in the fact that the spirits who love you take pleasure in coming to you; they rejoice that you remember them, and in being able to converse with you. There would be a desecration in this communication if it were carried out in a thoughtless or trivial manner.”
The possibility of communicating with spirits is extremely comforting, since it gives us the means of conversing with our relatives and friends who have left this life before us. By our contact, we draw them nearer to us, and they come to hear us and reply to us. There is no longer any separation between them and us. They aid us with their guidance, and assure us of how pleased they are that we remember them. We are happy to learn that they are happy, discover the details of their new existence from them, and obtain the certainty of reuniting with them one day.
936. What effect does the inconsolable sorrow of survivors have upon spirits who are the object of that sorrow?
“A spirit is touched by the memory and regrets of those it has loved. However, persistent and unreasonable sorrow is painful because, in excessive grief it sees a lack of faith in the future and confidence in God. Consequently, this ends up being an obstacle to advancement and perhaps even to their reunion.”
For a spirit who is happier than it was on Earth, regretting the change in life is to regret being happy. Let us take the example of two friends who are prisoners locked up in the same prison. Both of them will be free one day, but one is released before the other. Would it be kind on the part of the one who remains to regret that the other leaves sooner? Would there not be more selfishness than affection when one wants another to remain captive and suffering in the same circumstance as oneself? The same is true with two individuals who love one another on Earth. If one leaves first, the other should rejoice while patiently awaiting for his or her own freedom.
We may illustrate this subject by means of another comparison. You have a friend whose circumstances result in a painful existence although he or she remains physically close to you. Thus, your friend’s health or interests require a change to another country, where he or she will be better off in every respect. However, your friend will no longer be near you at every moment, but will still keep contact with you. The separation between you will only be in your daily life. Should you grieve for the loss of physical contact considering it is for your friend’s own good? Spiritism gives us clear proof of a future life and its presence around us as well as the continued affection of people we loved, and the relationships we are able to keep.
Spiritism offers us the greatest consolation for the most painful of human sorrows. Spiritism eliminates loneliness and abandonment because friends, with whom one can hold affectionate conversation, always surround the most isolated of human beings.
We are often impatient with the trials and tribulations of life. They seem so intolerable that we sometimes believe that we cannot endure them. Yet, if we face them with courage, and if we are able to silence our complaints, we will rejoice in the remembrance of the experience when we have finished our human existence. The same way that patient rejoices when they recover after completing a painful course of treatment that has cured the disease.